Howard's End

Fame is a fickle beast, and has the power to both make and break people, to both create and destroy careers as well as individuals.

One person at the arse end of the Fame spectrum who I’d gladly wish imminent destruction upon is Howard from the Halifax ads – a spectacularly unspectacular individual devoid of any notable features other than a pair of comedy glasses and a perpetual smile.

He joins a certain category of soulless celebrity who are famous just for being famous. As a viewer, I’ll decide who’s famous and who isn’t, and just because someone happens to be on telly thrice hourly doesn’t automatically mean they are thankyouverymuch.

Despite his fame, Howard is not going to live forever, nor is he going to learn how to fly. I suspect he’ll spend the rest of his days being pointed at in the street and will turn up on one of those “Where are they now?” type nostalgia programmes in twenty years’ time.

Already his role as being the sole figurehead of Halifax is under threat as he’s forced to share the limelight with some stupendously-thighed nobody miming to an Aretha Franklin song. It’s debateable whether there’s enough limelight to share though.