I can’t do hats. Whereas other chaps in their early ‘30s can exhibit a certain coolness with even the most humble of headgear such as a baseball cap, I have an unfortunate tendency to look like Tom Hanks in Philadelphia.
Either I’m too self-conscious peering out from under the peak of one, or I haven’t got the sort of face that suits them. At the other end of the hat scale is someone like Jay Kay who can effortlessly pull off the most bizarre of spiky millinery, but then admittedly his lifestyle is very different from mine. He wears that kind of stuff to work, being as he is, an exuberant and super-confident international music superstar. Nonchalantly turning up at my desk on Monday morning sporting headgear that looks like it belongs in Genghis Khan’s display cabinet would probably appear more than a little inappropriate.
2 comments:
I must admit I have tried to sport a rather snazzy trilby or panama, only to find I am the strange mutany half-brother of Alexei Sayle. Baseball caps also look as if they are three sizes too small and I need to raid the Greyfriar's tuck shop. I full sympathise with your obvious plight.
Mr Griffles.
I remember your trilby did have a certain pork-pie quality to it though and as far as the baseball cap goes it’s a moot point whether it’s better to resemble a mischievous public schoolboy or a man who’s immune system is being systematically destroyed by an incurable disease (bad luck Jeanette Krankie who has the unfortunate capacity to perfectly encapsulate both).
Thinking about it, given that we both look equally ridiculous in all types of headgear, there’s nothing to be gained from careful selection and we may as well go all out. Let’s all go to Ascot next year...
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