Jimmy And Graeme’s Aerosol Hair

You know you have those moments where you think “Hang on, was that real or did I dream it?”

I had such a thought recently about a product that used to be advertised on the back on red-top Sunday tabloids, typically at the foot of the sports page. I forget the brand name, but essentially, it was hair in a can. I remember also that it was endorsed by Jimmy White and Graeme Gooch, whose joy at once more sporting a full and luxuriant thatch was evident in the latter image of before-and-after proof.

I’ve just Googled it and can’t find any evidence of the product itself, though there are tantalising reports of hair transplants Jimmy’s undergone and a few baldy forums which namecheck him, which indicate that he’s exactly the sort of person to endorse such a invention.

I’m 99% sure it was real, though my main thought which accounts for the remaining 1% is that surely it could never have worked. Could it? Hair grows in rows. Not as a random foamy bouffant. The image I have in my head is more like that Silly String stuff that children squirt at each other at parties. Though having said that, a hairpiece of such construction wouldn’t look any less convincing than some of the rugs you see on daily display – their owners smug under a tufty toupee that looks as if the kindest thing to do would be to shovel it off their cranium and bury it in some sort of pet cemetery.

Maybe that's why Jimmy and Graeme gave it up and chose to destroy all the evidence.